Whoever said relationships were easy, clearly hasn't been in a real one. Because truth is, like anything else in life, relationships are hard. People don't know what they want, even when they think they do. Feelings change, people change, and we are left contemplating at times, if it's all worth it.
In these moments, we need to remember why we got into it in the first place. When you truly love someone, you love them even more despite their flaws. Which is why, you should follow these 10 rules, in order to make sure that no matter what happens, you two will make it work.
1. Forgive and forget
I put this as #1 because it is the most important element in ANY relationship. Do not bring back the past. It is there for a reason. If you want to move forward (together) then you will have to forgive, and eventually try to forget what happened.
2. Not hold grudges
Pride is the root of all evils. There is no pride in love. Don't waste your time going to bed angry, when you could be cuddling. Resolve the issue right away, because whatever it is you are fighting about, it's probably not even such a big deal to begin with. We tend to take things out of proportion sometimes, and only realize later on how useless the fight was to begin with.
3. Think as "we" not "me"
You guys are a team. You reflect one other. Remember that. When you are in a committed relationship, it's almost like you always need to think for two people. You're not longer thinking about you and your needs - but your partner, and their needs too. If you're not, then there's a problem.
Always move forward.
This is key. Wether it's going to watch the chick flick over the new James Bond, or settling for Chinese instead of pizza because your girlfriend wants to, just do it. It does not make you "weak" if you're compromising to make your s/0 happy. They need to reciprocate of course. It's a two way street, and should be equal.
6. Surprise one another
Keep things exciting. When you know it's his day off, cook him his favorite meal, put on some lingerie. Take her to that little italien bistro she loves, always remember to spoil each other. This way your relationship will never get boring.
I can't say this enough. Don't speak to your problems with your friends or family, and then not address them to your s/0. He is not a mind reader, she doesn't understand your point of view - talk with each other you'll be surprised with the response you get.
8. Not try to change the person you're with
Because people don't change... and if you truly love them, you wouldn't want them to. They are who they are, and that's why you fell in love with them in the first place. If not, you would be dating someone else. Embrace the person you're with, appreciate them, and don't take it for granted.
9. Show your feelings
Don't play games. Express how you feel. Blocking your feelings so that you don't get hurt, is a defence mechanism that ends up doing the exact opposite. Don't be scared to get hurt, that's what love is about - taking a risk. You're gambling with your heart, hoping that you'll hit a royal flush. But the only way you'll know, is if you go all in.
At each other, with each other, about each other. Don't take life too seriously. At the end of the day, you're in this together - to create something bigger than the two of you. Whether that's a family, an empire, or a dream, chase it. Don't let it go.
Canada's statistical agency released the data on June 16 to create a "portrait" of the "demographic and social profile of Canada's diverse LGBTQ2+ communities" — however, much of the data "[focuses] on LGB Canadians (lesbian, gay, bisexual), since Statistics Canada has been collecting detailed information on these communities since 2003."
There were 72,880 same-sex couples in Canada in 2016, making up 0.9% of all couples in Canada.
StatsCan said half of those same-sex couples lived in the major cities of Toronto, Montreal, Vancouver and Ottawa–Gatineau.
Between 2006 and 2016, the number of same-sex couples in Canada increased by 60.7%, compared to an increase of 9.6% in "opposite-sex" couples.
StatsCan said the increase "may be reflective, at least in part, of growing awareness and acceptance of sexual diversity in Canada."
LGBTQ2S+ hate crimes are on the rise in Canada
According to StatsCan's 2018 survey, LGB+ Canadians were both more likely to report being "violently victimized" throughout their lives and more likely to have experienced "inappropriate behaviours in public and online" than non-queer Canadians.
In 2018, LGB+ Canadians were "twice as likely" as non-queer Canadians "to report experiencing inappropriate behaviours" in the 12 months prior to the survey:
in public: 57% versus 22% of non-queer Canadians
online: 37% versus 15% of non-queer Canadians
at work: 44% versus 22% of non-queer Canadians.
Violent hate crimes against LGB+ Canadians were on par with violent racially-charged hate crimes in 2018.
Of hate crimes that targeted sexual orientation, 53% were violent crimes.
In comparison, 27% of hate crimes targeting religion and 52% of hate crimes targeting race or ethnicity were violent crimes, according to the data.
Further, according to StatsCan's 2018 survey, transgender Canadians were also more likely to report poorer mental health than cisgender Canadians.
They were also more likely to have "seriously contemplated suicide in their lifetimes."
Transgender Canadians were additionally more likely "to have been diagnosed with a mood or anxiety disorder" than cisgender Canadians.
The pandemic might have had a bigger effect on LGBTQ2S+ Canadians
StatsCan said that the LGBTQ2S+ population could have been "disproportionately affected" by job loss during the pandemic since a greater share of the communities' populations are between the ages of 15 and 24 — an age group whose employment levels "remains furthest from February 2020 levels."
LGBTQ2S+ Canadians also made less than their non-queer counterparts overall.
In 2018, 41% of LGBTQ2S+ Canadians "had a total personal income of less than $20,000" yearly, compared to 26% of non-queer Canadians.
In the same year, on average, queer income-earners in Canada made about 72% — $39,000 — of the average income of non-queer Canadians, at $54,000.
However, StatsCan noted that the income difference could partly be due to the large youth population in LGBTQ2S+ communities. Being enrolled in high school, CEGEPs or universities could reduce their potential income, the agency said.
In 2018, 33% of LGBTQ2S+ Canadians "found it difficult or very difficult to meet their needs in terms of transportation, housing, food, clothing, participation in some social activities and other necessary expenses," compared with just 27% of non-queer Canadians, according to StatsCan.
A viral video depicting Quebec's very own 'Billy Karaoke' interrupting Premier François Legault's press conference has made waves on social media — but as it turns out, it's not real. At least, according to the government, it's not.
The video, published on Billy's Instagram on May 12, has garnered over 28,000 views. It shows him replacing the Quebec Sign Language (QSL) interpreter and singing karaoke — albeit muted — while someone tries to forcibly remove him.
"A great victory for the karaoke community! [...] An intoxicating karaoke performance that lasted about 09 seconds," he wrote on Instagram.
What do the press conference organizers say?
However, Antoine Tousignant, head of the public affairs team for the minister of the executive council, which organizes Legault's press conferences, told Narcity Québec the video was falsified.
"The person could not even get in because the press briefings at the National Assembly [...] are monitored. There are special constables, he could never have entered there," he said.
"There is nothing more monitored than the ASSNAT."
'Billy Karaoke' responds
Billy responded to Narcity Québec after being asked whether the video was fake.
"You suspect me of editing [a fake video]? Me? The living karaoke legend of the web after all I've done for the karaoke community?" he said.
"After going to fight the street gangs in the Bronx, after going to fight racism by attacking the KKK, after going to fight homophobia, after going to fight the bikers, you still don't have faith in the karaoke community?"
Billy assured Narcity Québec that there was nothing it could report that would tarnish his reputation.
"You can't do anything to tarnish the reputation of the King! I am an ideal and ideals are immortal," he said.
The show is hosted by Afrim Pristine, who Food Network calls "the world's youngest Maître Fromager (Cheese Master)." Throughout the series, Pristine will showcase the cheese profile of cities and countries around the world, as he meets up with "culinary pioneers" of the cheese biz.
Quebec's episode is the fourth in the first season. Pristine tastes modern cheesy classics in Montreal (including poutine) and stops at two generations-old fromageries outside the city before travelling to Quebec City and Charlevoix.
You can expect to see him cross paths with Chuck Hughes of Le Bremner and Michele Forgione of Chez Tousignant. Montrealers know that these guys know their cheese!
Cheese-lovers everywhere can stream Cheese: A Love Story on the Global TV app with a subscription or through STACKTV on Amazon Prime. It premieres on June 9 at 8 p.m.
Then the pandemic hit, ushering in a punishing and turbulent time for the restaurant industry and its workers, so Payette decided to change careers.
Luckily, she had other passions.
"I always did modelling as a side job and for fun," she said. "I love working with photographers, stylists, content creators and artists. They are so inspiring and the model/fashion industry is opening up and becoming more about diversity, different body images, types, and styles."
In February 2020 she launched an OnlyFans page and, today, the 23-year-old is a top earner on the site.
Payette is hardly alone. OnlyFans — a platform where subscribers pay creators a monthly fee to access their content — has exploded in popularity during the pandemic. As of December 2020, the platform was said to have had more than 1 million content creators, up from just 60,000 in 2019.
"People are attracted to this platform for many reasons," she said. "Looking for a community, sharing, companionship or any social interactions that are no longer allowed or possible (due to the pandemic). It’s a modern way of entertaining through which you can build and share your content."
MTL Blog caught up with Payette to ask her what it’s like to be on OnlyFans in the time of COVID-19.
This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.
Payette’s profile boasts that she’s within the top 0.29% of content creators on OnlyFans.
"The earnings you make will vary depending on the content you produce [and] the hours and dedication you invest," she said.
She already had around 13,000 followers on Instagram before joining OnlyFans, which was an advantage and helped attract subscribers, she added.
"Also, I have a beautiful/natural pair of boobs that you won’t forget, and blue eyes. Thank you, mama," she continued.
But body type is not the only determination of a model’s success on OnlyFans, said Payette.
"You’d be surprised about the community’s diversity," she said. "It’s so refreshing and inspiring. Everybody respects and encourages each other, there’s room and place for any type."
To prospective OnlyFans models, she said, "I think the most important advice I could give is to respect yourself by setting your own limits and not the ones society created for women or men, as long as you are creating something you love and you are happy with. Respect yourself, be passionate and confident."
She also figures that people stuck at home have been making and consuming much more adult content than usual.
"I think with the travel ban and all the restrictions, a little dreaming or escape thanks to a platform is something we need right now," she said.
What are the best/worst parts of the job?
Payette said she enjoys her work. "The art and the visual is very exciting for me."
"At the end of the day, I can work from anywhere at any time I please," she said. "This freedom can also be found in the women’s, or men’s, bodies. It’s so liberating to explore and break the gender stereotypes."
The work also has its share of challenges, she said, like the time her account was hacked and held for ransom.
"I once was hacked and was a victim of a blackmail," she said.
"Someone had stolen my accounts, changed all my passwords. It was very frustrating knowing a stranger could access and damage all the hard work I’ve put together."
"At the end of the day, the platform provides you with a good security plan and options, so they assisted and helped me through this tough process."