15 Things All Montrealers Wish For

#9 - No More Language Conflicts
15 Things All Montrealers Wish For

  1. Serious discussions get boring really quickly in Montreal. That's because we're always discussing the same issues, complaining about the same problems and bitching about the same crappy weather.

Because of our diverse population, we may not agree on much, but there are at least a few things that every Montrealer can agree on. Things we wish would happen, and things we wish would go away once and for all.

1. Better Weather

Discussing the weather is like a religion in Montreal. It's either too hot, too cold, too rainy or too snowy. The summer is too short, the winter is too long, the other 2 seasons practically don't exist and the weather can change at any second. It's our favorite topic when it comes to small talk and the one thing that remains consistent throughout all those conversations is that Montrealers wish the weather was better here.

2. Better Roads

I don't think anyone in the city is satisfied with the road conditions in the city. If you're not a driver, you have no idea how much anxiety is can cause. It's one thing when you take the same road everyday because if you hit a pothole, you can remember to avoid it for the next 6 months. But when you're driving on a new or unfamiliar road, you just have no idea what fun and interesting hazards will pop up to ruin your day.

3. Another Stanley Cup

C'mon just one little itty bitty stanley cup. That's not too much to ask for is it?

4. Lower Taxes

Yes, taxes may not be a unique Montreal problem but people here have a special kind of hate for taxes. Not only do we have some of the highest taxes, but we're always getting new ones and the hikes are relentless.

5. End The SAQ Monopoly

Unless you work for the SAQ, chances are you hate the SAQ. You're dependent on their operating hours, you have no other options where to buy your booze and if you want to import anything, you have to go through them. Luckily this might soon come to an end but until it does, it remains on our wish list.

6. End the Uber vs Taxi Debate

I know you're all sick of hearing about it and the worst part is that the protests haven't even really begun yet. In case you didn't know the laws are still fuzzy when it comes to Uber, so until the city resolves this issue, the taxis are going to keep blocking bridges, egging cars and harassing Uber clients in a misguided attempt to sway public opinion.

7. Less Construction

Every street corner is under construction, but it wouldn't be so bad if the roads ever actually improved. Only they don't. It seems that road repairs take so long that by the time they fix 1 thing, 2 more things need fixing. There's no end in sight and nothing ever seems to get better, so it's no wonder this is a common wish.

8.  A Real Beach

We're a freaking island and yet we have no decent beaches, that makes no sense. Clock Tower Beach isn't a real beach and the beach at Parc Jean-Drapeau is surrounded by shit-water. (Yup, there's actual shit in the water)

9. No More Language Conflicts

People are sick of it. The damage it causes, the businesses it drives away, the arguments, the referendum threats. Stop ... Just stop.

10. Legalize Marijuana

Just do it already! The government is already our drug dealer when it comes to alcohol. They might as well sell us some weed too. Plus we could use the money and the tourism would only get better.

11. 6:00 a.m. Bars

The benefits are too great to ignore. People wouldn't all start scrambling for drinks right before last call. Drunks would be more likely to use public transportation since the metros would be running by the time they leave the bar. People would trickle out of bars instead of all coming out at once, and local businesses would make more money.

 12. Better Public Transportation

Here are some things you've all wished for: Longer operating hours, buses that actually show up on time, and most importantly: air conditioning.

13. To Have Fewer DJ's In The City

There are so many DJ's. I'm a DJ, you're a DJ, your best friend is a DJ, my dog is a DJ, your neighbor's grandma is a DJ.

14. More Variety

If only some of the more popular US stores would make their way to Montreal. The retail stores, the fast food chains or even just the snack options. Everyone has at least one business in mind they wish would come to Montreal.

15. For The Expos To Come Back

The Expos returning could only mean good things for Montreal. New business, more worldwide attention and more money being spent in the city.

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