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20 Things About Canada That Confuse The Heck Out Of Americans

Canadians are not apologizing for it.
20 Things About Canada That Confuse The Heck Out Of Americans

Canada and the United States have always had a fraught relationship, dating all the way back to the War of 1812, when the U.S. attempted to invade, failed miserably, and had their capital destroyed in retaliation.

Sure, the two countries became friends and allies in the two hundred years since, but tentions continue to occassionally simmer. In 2018, for example, leaders on both sides of the border exchanged some pretty harsh words during the long negotiation of a new trade deal.

In this period of renewed political hostility, it's worth taking a moment to point out the more lighthearted cultural exchanges between the two countries.

ALSO READ: Why Netflix Canada Is Going To Be Awful In 2019

So, listed below are twenty things about Canada that confuse the "heck" (this is Canada, we're keeping things polite) out of Americans. These items are each accompanied by Tweets from over the years from baffled Americans and a few ironic Canadians.

Enjoy! And let's remember that it's ok, even important, to laugh at each other and ourselves once in a while!

Americans are confused...

That Canada is actually an independent country

i thought Canada was part of America? or..? i did know....

January 7, 2019

So Canada goes from being this weird place with Poutine and Tim Hortons to the United States' biggest rival? 2018 is weird.

June 11, 2018

To many Americans, Canada is just a quirky satellite blob to the north that keeps to itself. Even worse, many Americans just lump Canada into discussions about the United States. While only the most ignorant people actually think Canada is part of the U.S., disregard for Canada is pretty common among the American population.

That they can't just "move" here when they're sick of the U.S.

At this point,I’m ashamed to be an American and is moving to Canada. Our country is weak because of trump

January 10, 2019

We're all familiar with the perennial American promise to "move to Canada" when things aren't going their way.

Sorry, but Canada actually has its own immigration system. Americans can't just "move" here without applying for a permit first.

by Canadians and their syrup

Today my son asked where maple syrup comes from during breakfast. Today is also the day he learned about a magical place called Canada

December 16, 2018

My cousins who live in Canada told me they pour Maple Syrup in the snow and eat it. Pretty sure we can still judge Canadians.

January 6, 2015

It's actually not Canada's only export! Americans can "judge" Canadians all they want for their syrup consumption, people in Canada are still healthier than their counterparts to the south.

That Canadians aren't all clichés

i live in canada. my home is an igloo. my transit is standing on a puck while wayne gretzsky takes a slap shot. when i have a wound my doctor pours syrup in it for free. life is good buddy.

December 5, 2018

Canadians are not cartoons.

That people speak French

"Why do they speak French in Canada.. Is France close?" - @leamenchaca

January 8, 2016

Did you know they speak French in Canada? #interesting

February 13, 2017

Did you know they speak French in Canada? God, that place is a mess.

August 14, 2012

Canada has deux langues officielles.

That Canada is a monarchy

Canada has a queen?

December 23, 2018

CaNaDa HaS a QuEen????????

November 12, 2018

Many Americans have absolutely no clue that Canada is a monarchy and shares a queen with dozens of other countries.

By Canadian money

A Canadian woman told me American money was weird for being all the same color while I was cashiering today. I think it’s weird that their currency looks like Monopoly money but ok. 🤷‍♀️ 💵

January 6, 2019

At least Canadian money isn't winkly, smelly, and a gross shade of green.

By Canadian cuisine

Poutine is just weird. Sorry, Canadians. It’s. Just. Weird. Otherwise, I love Canada. 🇨🇦

April 28, 2018

The fact that Canadians call kraft mac & cheese 'Kraft Dinner' is one of the few, valid reasons to hate Canada

July 31, 2017

Happy Canada Day why aren’t you guys calling ketchup chips ketchips?

July 1, 2018

First two words i learned in Canada :beavertail, eh

October 15, 2013

Americans may actually have a point here...

By Canadian slang

I’m blown away by how Canada has their own slang. Idk why. It’s like finding out your sibling has a secret life.Makes me wonder if Canadians are blown away by USA slang....

November 29, 2018

Canadian slang was actually first invented as a secret code to fool Americans.

By bagged milk

Milk bags are fucking stupid

I want cereal oh dammit where did I put my milk bag holder I can’t pour my milk without my milk bag holder oh here it is now where did I put those scissors I need scissors to access the milk inside of my milk bag

Fuck milk bags and fuck canada

November 14, 2018

Happy Thanksgiving to them milk bag lovers aka Canada

October 9, 2017

top 5 worst countries
1: canada
2: syrup fiends
3: milk bag freaks
4: snow mexico
5: its fuckin canada. tgats the joke it’s just canada

July 14, 2018

There are actually dozens upon dozens of Tweets from Americans who are angry about bagged milk.

To be fair, even some Canadians are unfamiliar with it:

I've lived in Canada my whole life and never seen a milk bag, this stereotype needs to stop.

December 17, 2015

That Canada is so huge

why is canada so big. what are you guys hiding up there

November 16, 2018

Americans are indoctrinated with the belief that the U.S. is the "number one" country on the planet. So for some, the fact that Canada is actually bigger can be unsettling and confusing.

That not everyone has an accent

I still read anything hockey-related in a Canadian accent

January 11, 2019

If you have a Canadian accent... lose it immediately or else

January 10, 2019

"Really?? You're from Canada????? You don't have an accent, though..."

By Tim Hortons

Lmfao Americans barely learn about Canada .. That's why they dont know much about here. "who's the prime minister of Canada?" "Tim hortons?"

July 13, 2011

Step 1). What the fuck is a Timbit? #OtherUsesForTimbits

January 9, 2019

General American ignorance of Tim Hortons became especially clear this week when Timbits, the famous Canadian donut holes, were trending on Twitter.

By the Canadian system of government

ffs some people I swear, you have the INTERNET, you can just look up who the president of canada is!! it's not hard!!

December 14, 2018

Canada does not have a president, but it does have autonomous regions called "provinces," but, no, they're not "states."

That Canada is progressive

Life seems so good in Canada man. Weed is legal, healthcare is free. Animal testing is illegal, and the drinking age is 19 😭 this why we never see mfs from Canada wildin

July 24, 2018

Canada always seems to get it right when America gets it wrong. While so many factors prevent the United States from advancing on key issues, Canada is moving decisively forward.

By Canadian friendliness

Canadians are too friendly

December 19, 2015

Canadians are probably friendly because they have a functional country. The truth is hard.

By the ubiquitous maple leaf

Why canada flag a leaf? that look dumb af

August 8, 2012

they need to put justin bieber’s face on the canada flag. idk why they put some lame leaf lmao

March 15, 2018

Everything in #Canada has a maple leaf on it, flags, buildings, clothes, signs and in this sushi restaurant chop sticks

February 15, 2012

Well, Canadians have to do something to distinguish themselves from Americans.

By the cold

“Canada: It’s America, but cold.”

October 22, 2018

Canada is America's penthouse but the windows are broken so it's really cold in the winter

January 29, 2013

Believe it or not, "cold" is not the only adjective that could possibly describe Canada. Yet, it seems to be one of the only things Americans know about their neighbour country to the north. There are actually parts of Canada that are relatively mild all year round.

Winter temperatures are generally lower, it's true. But tens of millions of Americans live in the desert and that must be equally unpleasant.

By Canadian Thanksgiving

Why in the world is Canadian Thanksgiving in early October???

October 8, 2017

Why is the Canadian Thanksgiving in October?? Did the Pilgrims feast with the Mounties?

October 10, 2010

Why do Americans care so much?

By Canadian spelling

freakin canadians spelling things weird

November 25, 2012

Canadian spelling is somewhere between British and American spelling and we're not apologizing for it.

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