25 Signs You’ve Spent Way Too Much Time In Montreal

Montréal, je t'aime.
25 Signs You’ve Spent Way Too Much Time In Montreal

Photo cred - ∃Scape

If you're reading this, chances are you call Montreal home. This city is without question one of the most dynamic cities on the planet (ya ya, we know, we  say it all the time) and as a Montrealer you know just how many things this city can be. It's hard to really put into words what makes Montreal just quite so special, or at least it would take too many, and it's only after having actually lived in Montreal for any significant amount of time that one can even begin to put their thumb on it.

Just like any other metropolis, there are certain commonalities that define its culture, its norms, its essence if you will, but each city also has specific traits that, after a while, you either grow to love or learn to hate, and which you'll forever identify with as being so uniquely Montreal. For better or worse, here are 25 Signs You’ve Spent Way Too Much Time In Montreal.

1. You're a habs fan whether you like it or not

Have you met our Lord And Saviour Carey Price?

2. Only know certain words by the French alternative and vice versa

You mean it's actually called a convenience store, Shopper's Drug Mart, cold cuts, faire le plein, stationner, planche a neige...

3. Come to expect a mural on every wall

That blank wall you got there is not very pretty.

4. Step up your style game when leaving the house, also known as Hipsterification

Fashion is life.

5. Consider a 20 minute drive as far

J'ai tu besoin d'un passeport pour aller à Beaconsfield? So do I need a passport to go to Pointe-aux-Trembles?

6. Become a bit of a foodie/coffee snob

What do you mean there's no fois gras on my poutine.

7. Find it weird to start partying before 11pm

Anything before that is just pre-drinking.

8. Can’t understand bars that close before 3am

Because 2am is when I do my best drinking.

9. Understand the superiority of a Montreal bagel, smoked meat, and poutine

All those posers wish they did it like the MTL.

10. Expect to be able to buy alcohol anywhere they sell food

So let me get this straight, people in Toronto have to buy their Captain Crunch and Chianti separately?

11. Drink and smoke liberally in public places

Cause there ain't no party like a Park Bench Party.

12. Are as bi-polar as the weather

Much like on any given day, you can start sunny and happy, and finish soggy and miserable.

13. Avoid the Underground City if you can

Ya, it's great when you don't feel like putting on your boots to go for lunch, but it kinda smells and takes forever.

14. Either absolutely love or utterly hate Bixi

Environment - good. In my way - bad.

15. Find smooth roads luxurious

Excuse me Sir, would you like some Grey Poupon to go with your lack of sinkholes? Pffft!

16. Call the subway the metro

Ya that's right, we call it the metro, and it rides on rubber wheels and each station is a unique architectural work of art. So ha.

17. Strangely long for the return of the Expos even if you were never a fan

Regardless of whether or not I actually even care for the most boring sport known to man, I want the Expos back in Montreal.

18. Find public protesting pretty status quo

#manifencours is now trending.

19. Don’t understand restaurants that don’t have a terrasse

Umm, why the hell would I want to sit and eat inside. Can't we just go sit on the sidewalk over there?

20. Expect there always to be something fun going on

Festival, concerts, and clubs oh my!

21. Shudder at the thought of being associated with America

That's what the rest of Canada is for.

22. Have a love/hate relationship with MTL Blog

You think it's tripe but you just can't get enough :)

23. Take skiing/snowboarding on the weekend for granted

What the hell is a ski holiday?

24. Rejoice at paying low rent but cry at the high taxes

Damn good thing my rent is so cheap cause the man just took half my dang pay cheque.

25. Can't wait to leave but will always call it home.

As much as there is to complain about here, Montreal is where the heart is.

For more Montreal insight follow Synden on Twitter @Synden_

Photo cred - Fred_514

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