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27 Things That Only Montrealers Would Ever Put Up With

Photo cred - Carlos R. Martinez

Montrealers love tooting our own horn, and who can blame us, this city is legit. Montreal does a whole bunch of things so right, and makes other cities mad jealous. As Montrealers, we have much to be proud of, which gives us a certain swagger to our step, but with all that good going on around us, there's invariably some bad that comes along with it.

Anywhere else, these minor "inconveniences" would be huge issues, and would surely bring most city infrastructures crashing to its knees, but not here. Not in Montreal. We don't let them stop us. Nope, we carry on about our business and put up with them like a boss. Sure we bitch about them constantly, but still, here are 27 Things That Only Montrealers Would Ever Put Up With.

1. Squeegee kids

Everyone's gotta make a living right? But this is called entrapment and there's nothing you can do about it.

2. Potholes

With all that swerving going on, anyone would thing we drive drunk all the time.

3. Lack of beaches

We got the heat, we got the water, we got the bods, and yet beaches in the city are hard to come by. We have the Clock Tower beach, but you can't even go swimming! What the eff is that!?

4. Ridiculously high taxes

With the highest taxes in Canada, Montrealers hand over pretty much a 1/3 of our paycheck to the gov't. And yet we still live here.

5. The weather

Mama always said, Montreal weather is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. It's all about layers. Oh, and we love winter. Just love it.

6. Making plans with large groups

With an almost infinite amount of possibilities, only a Montrealer knows the true strife of organizing a fun Montreal activity for a big group of friends. No one can actually decide on anything, and everyone has an opinion. Seriously, I don't even wanna go anymore you guys.

7. Sheisty SPVM

Fact - Montreal popo are kinda whack. Over the last few years especially, the SPVM have developed a seriously bad reputation for their questionable tactics when dealing with the public, not to mention the vandalism they have done not only to their own cruisers, but even city hall itself. For shame.

8. Hipsters

Hipsters exist in every city, but it would seem that not only do we put up with them, Montreal actually embraces them. Can it even be considered a subculture anymore when everyone is doing it?

9. High prices of street food

Not to hate on our stellar food truck scene, but man, for what is essentially a 3 to 4 bite belly teaser, it's pricey as fvck.

10. Road closures

Montreal is by far no stranger to construction and we have accepted that our streets are like Swiss cheese, and getting cock-blocked from getting to work is à la mode.

11. Corruption

Can you say Charbonneau Commission? Ooof course you can, it's even televised.

12. Traffic everywhere

For such a small city, we deal (fairly well) with some serious traffic. WHO MADE THIS CITY!?

13. Street parking

Apparently we like being mind fvcked by ridonculous parking signs. I'm convinced the city does it deliberately to cash in on all the inevitable parking tickets caused by the confusion, not to mention the alarm clocks we set for ourselves in order to stay on top of alternate-side free parking.

14. Never ending condos

Development in a city is generally a good sign, but our real estate situation is getting to be a bit overkill. Seriously, if it's not a resto, it's a condo.

15. Lack of metro stops

Apparently the West island, East island, North and South shores don't exist according to the STM.

16. Over sensitivity

Montrealers are opinionated people, which is not necessarily a negative. Everyone's a critic but no one can actually take any criticism it seems.

17. Lack of WiFi in the metro

I mean, what the hell are you supposed to look at when riding the metro. Books are for old people, staring is rude, and sleeping can be treacherous. The STM have started rolling out wifi signal in some areas, but we be impatient, yo.

18. Drunk Americans

Montreal loves its tourists. It's great for our economy and, at the end of the day, the more the merrier right? But let's be honest, drunk Americans stick out like a sore thumb.

19. Language Police

Yep, Montreal has a language police. The OQLF regulates all commercial business to make sure that French is always first and foremost, sometimes slapping hefty fines on offenders. Totally normal.

20. Collapsing bridges

A collapsing bridge is not really "News" anymore. It's "Normals".

21. Closing time on St-Lo

Ever try walking on the Main at closing time while completely sober? That shit is real.

22. Furry scavengers

We like squirrels, raccoons, and skunks constantly sniffing around our porch, making a mess. They're adorable.

23. Gas prices

Fact - Filling up is absolutely soul crushing in this city. But how joyous is it when gas dips below 1.40! Best.Day.Ever.

24. SAQ monopoly

SAQ = government-owned corporation. Government-owned corporation = the devil, but no big deal.

25. No rights on red

Only in Montreal can you not turn right on a red light. Gets confusing if you drive off island often.

26. MTL Blog

That said, we are gaining international readers all the time.

27. Lack of Stanley Cups in recent years

Unlike Maple Leaf fans, we are not used to not hoisting the Cup every year, or at least every other year, but we put up with it, you know, to give others a chance.

For more Montreal insights follow Synden on Twitter @Synden_

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