At this stage in the game, I'm pretty sure you guys know how much I'm obsessed with Riverdale.
I've been keeping up with the series pretty religiously, and apparently, we're going to know who killed Jason Blossom super soon. Like, tomorrow or Friday, depending on whether you're a Netflix or CW Riverdale fan.
The point is, the season finale is sure to be explosive AF. But if you need a little help getting into the hype, don't worry. I've been analyzing the show (because I'm a huge nerd, let's be honest), and I've come up with some theories as to who exactly might be Jason Blossom's killer. But first...
SPOILERS! Lots of Riverdale spoilers ahead! ALL THE SPOILERS!
DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ RIVERDALE SPOILERS!
1. Come on, it was totally Betty.
Because Betty's shown as being perfect AF, except with a few cracks; and we all know that most drama shows love tacking the "secret killer" badge to the "hyper perfect person with a facade that's beginning to break apart".
But also because, come on, they're making it super obvious.
Betty's determined and ambitious to a fault. She'll do whatever she needs to go to get what she wants, no matter who she leaves in her wake; and when it comes to her sister Polly, she tends to fly off the handle a bit. (See: almost boiling a dude in a jacuzzi wearing a jet black bob wig, and threatening to straight-up murder Cheryl Blossom).
Of course, I feel like they're making Betty the obvious killer at this point, so maybe she just might be a giant red herring...
2. Or maybe it was Polly. 🤔🤔
Aight, it probably wasn't Polly. She was gone by the time the whole Jason drama happened; plus, she really did seem to love Jason, and seems dedicated to finding out who killed him.
Still, the whole Polly/Jason relationship is a little shady. Like, was there more to their relationship than we know? And why did Jason have Polly's name in the football team's book o' conquests?
I don't know if Polly legit murdered Jason Blossom, but something about this whole situation feels a bit off to me.
3. Okay, but it was definitley one of the Coopers.
Betty gets her ambitious personality from somewhere, guys, and Mr. and Mrs. Cooper are as ambitious as they come.
Although the main villain of the Cooper fam seemed to be Alice, we now know that Hal Cooper is not as innocent and complacent as he seems. Plus, his hatred for the Blossoms runs as deep as the water at Sweetwater River.
Still, would they kill Jason? I don't know. In the words of Alice Cooper, I don't think they had the stomach for it.
4. The Southside Serpents did it.
So we know Jason was in bed with the Serpents, selling drugs for them to make enough money to get him and Polly (and their child) TF outta Riverdale.
We also know that FP/The Serpents had a lot more to do with Jason's death than they're letting anyone know... Plus, we freakin' saw Jason's letterman jacket in FP's closet.
I don't know if they're directly involved in Jason's murder. Jason was also tortured before he died, and I don't feel like that's how the Serpents operate.
Still, after last week's episode, where FP legit gets arrested and the gang's suspicions about his involvement goes up by about infinity percent, I feel, deep down, like there's something hella shady going on here.
Plus, why else would FP be so desperate to get out of Riverdale with Jughead so quickly? Becuase he wants to start afresh? Um, no.
For the sake of the plot, I don't think he'll actually be the murderer... but let me tell ya, if I were to follow my intuition, I'd straight-up j'accuse him.
5. It was the real serpent on the series: Miss Grundy.
Yo, guys, Miss Grundy is not to be trusted.
First of all, let's ignore the fact that her whole storyline was kind of creepy in the first place. Like, putting that aside, she's kind of an integral character to the Archie universe, so throwing off the series so quickly is not exactly something the show would do.
Also, I feel like she left super ominously? Once Betty found out about Miss Grundy's tutoring Jason, MG was all too eager to GTFO out of Riverdale. And we never did learn the details about what went down between her and Jason, but MG did seem super shady when he was brought up.
Plus, Betty's voiceover at the end of MG's last episode hints that she was actually kinda the worst... which I agree with. Still, does that mean she legit tortured and murdered a guy? Maybe not.
But there's something there, friends. There's something there.
6. It was freakin' Cheryl.
Cheryl is the HBIC.
Cheryl is the queen.
And if Cheryl wants her beloved brother dead after finding out he, oh, I don't know, betrayed her and the Blossom family, and attempted to abandon her at Thornhill with their psycho parents for Polly Cooper? Yeah. I don't think she'd react too well to that.
True, it seems like Cheryl is hella torn up about the Jason situation. But she's a good actress... and we all know how nothing can tear you up quite like guilt can.
Well, guys, there you have it.
The proof that I have way too much time on my hands. I hope I was right about at least one of these, but either way, Riverdale has been entertaining AF, so you know there's some kinda awesome twist on the way.