14 Reasons Why I Love My Resting Bitch Face
I'm definitely not smiling on the inside.
One of first traits you would notice about me, is that I have a constant resting bitch face. Give me a bunch of puppies and then I'll smile, otherwise, get used to my not-smiling face.
I adore having a RBF face, and honestly I only see perks to it. After all, my face is just neutral. I'm just thinking, existing and my face is not here to entertain anybody. Especially not for creeps who ask ladies to smile more (really who do they think they are to tell us what to do with our faces?)
I love my resting bitch face because strangers don't talk to me
My RBF has saved me from a lot of uncomfortable situations that I know my friends have encountered because they look nice and friendly. I've never had a creep touching me in the metro (yet) and hope my frowning will keep them from trying. That's not scientific at all, but I like to believe it is.
I love my resting bitch face because I intimidate people
Because I don't look approchable, other humans don't dare talking to me. I basically look like I'm plotting revenge while in fact I'm either thinking about what I'll eat for lunch or how to smash down patriarchy. But you'll never know because my face stays exactly the same.
I love my resting bitch face because I look mysterious
In addition to my beautiful RBF, I don't talk much when I'm around people I don't know well. So folks think I'm just too smart and cool to smile (or I like to believe that's what they're thinking).
I love my resting bitch face because I look like I'm judging everyone
And I am.
I love my resting bitch face because people eventually realize how nice I am
When nobody expects you to be nice, you can only be perceived as even nicer. So when I'm friends enough with someone, they always tell me how they though I was a straight up bitch when they first met me. And now they're only more happy to see how nice and funny I am (ok, they never say that last part, but let me live my own fantasy).
I love my resting bitch face because I make people feel special
There's nothing like one's satisfaction of making someone going from frowning to smiling, and I may or may not have used that in the past to get favours.
I love my resting bitch face because I make people feel awkward
There's nothing like one's sadness and awkwardness of making someone going from smiling to frowning, and I use this to get out of situations or just for my own pleasure ; yes, I have a weird kind of humour.
I love my resting bitch face because I look like a Boss Lady
I love my resting bitch face because people know my emotions (aka none).
Contrary to most people, my RBF is often a reflection of how I'm feeling. If I'm not smiling, it's because I'm feeling either neutral or having a bad day. It's as simple as that.
I love my resting bitch face because people don't dare telling me to smile
That is just how hardcore my RBF is.
I love my resting bitch face because I'm ready for the paparazzi
It's simple, I prefer to look like I'm slaying when people take my picture (that never happens, but I like being prepared for every eventuality). You may see a glimpse of a smile, but it's only because I'm listening to a funny podcast, but it has 100% nothing to do with anything that is happening around me.
I love my resting bitch face because people know when I really do smile
When you're known to be a RBF master and you crack a smile, your peeps know that you genuinely mean it.
I love my resting bitch face because knows not to mess with me
I look more confident and nobody wants to take advantage of me. It's as if my whole face was sending an "or else" warning.
I love my resting bitch face because I have to roll my eyes to show my discontent
Not exactly a perk, but eh, it's like workout for my eyes !