10 Reasons Why Girls With Big Butts Are Awesome
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun.
I am obsessed with big butts. They're just so pretty to look at. The fact that I don't have a big butt is making me very sad. When I feel like messing with my friends or family, I tell them that I'm saving money to get butt implants. They lecture me for hours and I just sit there and laugh in my head because I get them every time... I've actually done some research and found out that having a big butt is amazing for more than one reason. So here are 10 reasons why girls with big butts are awesome.
1. Women with big butts are more intelligent
An Oxford university study has shown that women with big butts are more intelligent than women with flat butts. Scientists are actually getting paid for this, it's amazing. Best job ever?
2. Women with big butts have smarter kids
That same Oxford University study found that women with big butts are not ONLY smarter than women with flat butts, but also give birth to smarter children. Butt fat is high in Omega 3 fatty acids, which is responsible for baby's brain development.
3. Women with big butts are more immune to chronic illnesses
University of Oxford didn't want to stop there... They also found that women with big butts are more immune to chronic illnesses like diabetes and heart problems.
4. Big butts are more attractive on basic instincts level
Science has spoken: men are extremely attracted to the lower spine curvature that women with big butts have. There's a scientific explanation behind this phenomenon. Booty spine curvature ensures a smooth and healthy pregnancy... so it all comes down to basic procreation instincts.
5. Girls with big butts are healthier
Having a big butt also means higher leptin and dinopectina levels in the female body. Leptin and dinopectina are hormones responsible for regulating weight and carrying anti-inflammatory, vascular-protective and anti-diabetic attributes. Boom!
6. Butt fat is not really bad for you
Compared to other kinds of fat, butt fat is the most harmless kind of all. For example, belly fat can accumulate around vital organs and, consequently, lead to high blood pressure and numerous diseases. Butt fat doesn't do any of that harm.
7. Big butts make great pillows
If you've never used your girlfriend's butt as a headrest, you're living life wrong, my friend.
8. Big butts are like actual drugs to men
According to PLOS One study, the sight of a large butt activates the the same area of the male brain that is otherwise activated by drugs, alcohol and food. Booty is literally like crack, yeah.
9. They offer a lot more things to hold on to in the bedroom
Apparently, most men prefer a little junk in the trunk, because it's more fun in the bedroom. Yes, this was also a scientific study.
10. Women with big butts look hot
An hourglass shape is just so attractive, like come on. Even I often catch myself staring at big butts and making girls uncomfortable. Big butts are life.