That 20's Life: Being In The Friend Zone
There are benefits within this place we call a friend zone.
Like myself, those in their early 20's often feel compelled to get into a relationship. As we grow older, one night stand's become less exciting, and suddenly, the thought of acquiring a boyfriend or girlfriend becomes more appealing. When meeting a person of the opposite sex, people often jump to judging whether they are in or out of their league and if they make appropriate candidates as lovers. After this stage comes the determination process, where one will decide if the person of interest is someone they will try to pursue. If not, that person will end up getting thrown in the "friend zone".
The friend zone, as the notable Urban Dictionary puts it, "Is a very frustrating and very shitty place to be. It's what you attain after you fail to impress a woman you're attracted to...I've been locked in the friend zone with her since high school, that's messed up yo." But the friend zone can actually be quite fun. And it can even help you in attaining a lover, if you're among many of those in their 20's that feel pressured into doing so.
1. Free dating and relationship advice
I've normally always trusted in my best girl friends' opinions when it came to dating advice. Until I realized that most of my girl friends were pretty much always on the same page as me, that is the page of a girl's point of view. But having a friend zone has provided me with the right relationship advice when needed. Who better than to ask about a guy, then a guy himself? That goes for you men as well, the next time you're unsure about what to get a girl for her birthday, think about asking your female friend, before asking your buddies because she might know something they don't. Having a friend of the opposite sex is kind of like getting insider info on the enemy's plan of attack.
2. Improvement of comfort levels and confidence with the opposite sex
Believe it or not, some people are still stuck in their elementary school days and are often shy around the opposite sex. You can call me guilty, because I still won't burp around my best guy friend. I don't know what it is about the opposite sex, but it often feels as though my friendships with girls are on different levels than those with guys. Having numerous friend zones however, has enlightened my approach towards these situations. Friend zones have taught me to feel more relaxed and less stressed, so that future encounters or potential dates with the opposite sex will go smoothly.
3. The Most Successful Relationships Stem From Good Friendships
Just think of Friends' Ross and Rachel, two best friends who made their friendship into a rocky but successful relationship. The X- Files actress, Gillian Anderson once wrote: "It seems to me that the best relationships - the ones that last - are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.” Scully speaks truth.
4. Amazing Friendships
If the friend zone doesn't lead you into a relationship after all, you've still got something wonderful to embrace: an undeniably amusing friendship. While the friend zone might seem like an unfortunate place to be in at first, accepting it can eventually bring forth a close bond between two people. As well, this tie suggests the opportunity to see relationships, and life itself, through a whole new lens.
Although getting thrown into the friend zone generally starts off through a solely one sided attraction between a guy and a girl ("I've been locked in the friend zone with her since high school, that's messed up yo"), if you ask me, its a a term that is highly underrated. The friend zone is reallyjust a simple friendship, one that may or may not lead to an intimate relationship. If it does, like in the case of Ross and Rachel, than kudos to you. And if it doesn't, then you've acquired and built a new and surely valuable friendship.