This is a true story. I was watching TV in my living room, minding my own business, when I felt a tickling feeling on my arms. I look down expecting to see a hair or a thread from my shirt. Instead I looked down a saw a multi-legged nightmare as big as my palm casually crawling on me.
I never jumped up so quickly in my entire life!
First for context, here are a few terrifying facts about centipedes:
They can live up to 7 years
They CAN bite you!
The bite can become swollen and the pain is comparable to a bee sting.
It has venom in it's freakin' legs.
They're nocturnal, so you're more likely to have them crawl on you at night, which is just pure evil.
When it is threatened, the centipede repels its enemy by emitting a foul odour.
As if I didn't already have a reason to panic.
After spotting it, I whipped my hand at the speed of light, which sent the nefarious creature flying toward the wall, where I lost track of it.
Just then, I turned towards my window only to see a second, larger centipede popping out of the drain hole beneath my window. Holy shit that thing was fast!
I ran to grab the nearest object I could find, which happened to be a shoe, and crushed it before I could lose sight of it. I mounted it's head on a spike and left it as a warning to others, then I spend the next hour trying to locate the other one.
Unfortunately I couldn't find it. Which means it's still out there in my apartment somewhere. Worse, now it's seeking revenge.
So why so many centipedes?
It turns out that all that rain we've had this summer has created the perfect breeding grounds for bugs, including centipedes who love damp humid places.
So if you want to get ride of them here a few tips:
Use a fan, air conditioner or dehumidifier to keep your home dry.
Make sure there are no piles of wood or leaves near your house.
Fill in cracks around your house using silica gel
Never sleep again.