10 Things All Americans Need To Know About Canada Before Moving Here
A checklist to see if you're worthy of living here.
While everyone is looking down their nose at America, Canada is enjoying its moments in the sun.
And while a lot of people are talking shit about moving here, some people are actually quite serious about it.
That's because Canada is the obvious choice. We're close by, we have great beer and we're probably the country that resembles America the most.
However there are a few subtle differences between America and Canada. So in order to minimize the cultures shock we've compiled a list of all the important things Americans need to know about Canada before moving.
Thanksgiving is in October
As it should be. American Thanksgiving is way to close to Christmas.
Winter hats are called tuques
It's pronounced "tük", and sometimes it's spelled "toque". But it's definitely not called a beanie.
Canadian beer is much stronger
Take it easy 'Murica, you have to build up a tolerance before you can drink like a Canadian.
When we wear Uggs, it's out of necessity
We never thought Uggs were fashionable, but we need them to survive winter.
Buddy is a term of endearment
So when someone says he's not your buddy, you're definitely not his friend, guy.
We don't say soda or pop
We either call it a soft drink or we just call it whatever is in the can. If it's a coke, it's a coke, not a soda.
Pizza toppings go under the cheese
Well, as many as we can fit, but sometimes the toppings overflow and we're forced to put some on top.
Dunkin Donuts is an endangered species in Canada.
Milk comes in bags
That's just the way it is. and we don't drink milk at dinner either, that shit's nasty.
Despite what you may think we have a lot of guns here
But we prefer shooting animals and targets rather than each other, and when we do accidentally shoot each other, we have free health care.