10 Things To Hate About Montreal
Montreal is a great city but there are things wrong with it.
We love Montreal, but even we cannot deny there are some aspects of our fair city which are incredibly frustrating. Hate-inspiring even. While the cons aren't in abundance, they are there and can't be ignored. Some may argue that the bad parts of Montreal make the good that much more shiny. Nice try. No matter what, there are certain things we hate about Montreal, and we're gonna vent our frustration.
Practicing Your French...Only to be Responded to in English
Strictly an Anglo problem, and it is quite frustrating. When you're trying to improve your French, the most disheartening thing is when a French person shuts you down entirely and just starts speaking in English. They're basically saying 'please, your French is terrible, don't even try. You're embarrassing yourself."
The Metro Always Breaking Down
Thesome of our frustration on this city-wide problem, but this can of worms deserves to be re-opened. Montreal's metro is an awesome service, no argument there, only it doesn't quite fulfill that 'service' when its stopped running on a Monday morning for no apparent reason and you're late for work. God only knows what causes all of these random closures. All we know is that we hate it when it happens.
Montreal is ALWAYS Under Construction
Maybe this is more of a Summer problem. but you can find random posses of construction teams all year round. How many times have you been on the bus, only for it to rake a random route change because of some construction obstruction that randomly popped up last night? McGill students can also relate, since the campus is constantly being reworked. How long has the Redpath entrance been blocked off? Worse still, even when construction is finished, the work is so poorly done its almost worse than it was before, or only lasts a season until something breaks. Corruption at its finest.
People Who Walk Slowly Downtown
Or anywhere in the city for that matter, but 'slow walkers' are especially annoying when you're in the hustle and bustle of down town. No one gets a free pass on this one (not even old people) because if you're gonna take to the streets, you best be able to keep up. NOTHING is more frustrating than trying to catch a bus, or a movie, or meet a friend, and being stuck behind a slow walker for ten blocks. Taking your time and being leisurely is never cute, so just speed up and we'll all be happier for it.
Shitty Snow Removal
As a whole, the snow removal job done by the city's snowplows is fairly solid, at least on major streets and areas. If you live in smaller neighborhoods or on a random side street, you may not think the same. This is also a legit problem for West Island residents who have sub-par snow removal officials. Share the snowplow love and make sure everyone can actually get out of their driveways please.
SAQs Closing Early On Weekends
The Friday hours of most SAQs are great, they're open til a solid 9pm. Then, on Saturday and Sundays, things take a dark turn. For some reason SAQs actually close earlier on the weekend. What crazy logic does this follow? If you're getting shwastey, you are not thinking far enough ahead on Friday night to plan for your alcohol consumption the rest of the weekend. Even if you do, its most likely going to get consumed in one night anyway. Throw us a bone here, we're too hungover on Saturdays to get out of our house before 6pm anyway. Thank God there are a few SAQ Express' littered about the city. Not enough though.
Hipsters Making You Feel Uncool
Montreal is like the Portland of Canada, and hipsters dominate certain areas of the city (looking at you Mile End). Clad in skin tight pants, black beanies, and pins of bands 'you've never heard of' these hip-folk definitley add a layer of cool to Montreal, except when they get all snooty with you. Sorry we don't know what music you're talking about, or why corporate North America is evil this week, just don't make us feel retarded and uncultured because of our lack of hipster-knowledge.
Too Much Poutine Love
We get it, poutine is delicious. We know it, the city knows it, hell, Canada knows it, so can we just calm down with the city-wide obsession? Greasy diners are meant to serve high-cal, low-cost, fat filled foods, but must we see poutine on the menu of nearly every restaurant in Montreal? And 'gourmet poutine?' Doesn't matter how much duck-confit you throw on those fries, or what fancy cheese you're using, poutine will never be gourmet, nor should it be.
Too Many Students
Montreal's student population is a blessing and a curse. On the upside, students keep the city young, full of energy, and they keep the bars and clubs filled. Then there's Frosh. Frosh is awesome if you're a part of it, but if you're just a regular citizen of the city, you know Frosh as that time of year where a bunch of stupid young people fill the streets and annoy you. Not to mention the fact that as soon as September hits, every bus and subway car is filled to the brim because of added students. At least May to July is a soft break, but then there's...
Montreal Summers are an epic time of fun, sun, and booze. The only downside? The shit ton of tourists who flock to every festival and event do provide some nice cash to the businesses and keep things vibrant, but they also annoyingly fill all of our favourite spots and generally act super douchey (the American tourists at least). Also, how many times have you been asked for directions from a totally lost and scared tourist? Do these people not have smartphones, or check a map before they venture out and get lost in the city? Step up your game people.
Got something you loathe with all your heart about Montreal? Did we hate a little too hard on some parts? Vent your frustrations in the comments below.