10 Things You Should Do If You Want Your Relationship To Work
#9 is a must.
Whoever said relationships were easy, clearly hasn't been in a real one. Because truth is, like anything else in life, relationships are hard. People don't know what they want, even when they think they do. Feelings change, people change, and we are left contemplating at times, if it's all worth it.
In these moments, we need to remember why we got into it in the first place. When you truly love someone, you love them even more despite their flaws. Which is why, you should follow these 10 rules, in order to make sure that no matter what happens, you two will make it work.
1. Forgive and forget
I put this as #1 because it is the most important element in ANY relationship. Do not bring back the past. It is there for a reason. If you want to move forward (together) then you will have to forgive, and eventually try to forget what happened.
2. Not hold grudges
Pride is the root of all evils. There is no pride in love. Don't waste your time going to bed angry, when you could be cuddling. Resolve the issue right away, because whatever it is you are fighting about, it's probably not even such a big deal to begin with. We tend to take things out of proportion sometimes, and only realize later on how useless the fight was to begin with.
3. Think as "we" not "me"
You guys are a team. You reflect one other. Remember that. When you are in a committed relationship, it's almost like you always need to think for two people. You're not longer thinking about you and your needs - but your partner, and their needs too. If you're not, then there's a problem.
Always move forward.
This is key. Wether it's going to watch the chick flick over the new James Bond, or settling for Chinese instead of pizza because your girlfriend wants to, just do it. It does not make you "weak" if you're compromising to make your s/0 happy. They need to reciprocate of course. It's a two way street, and should be equal.
6. Surprise one another
Keep things exciting. When you know it's his day off, cook him his favorite meal, put on some lingerie. Take her to that little italien bistro she loves, always remember to spoil each other. This way your relationship will never get boring.
I can't say this enough. Don't speak to your problems with your friends or family, and then not address them to your s/0. He is not a mind reader, she doesn't understand your point of view - talk with each other you'll be surprised with the response you get.
8. Not try to change the person you're with
Because people don't change... and if you truly love them, you wouldn't want them to. They are who they are, and that's why you fell in love with them in the first place. If not, you would be dating someone else. Embrace the person you're with, appreciate them, and don't take it for granted.
9. Show your feelings
Don't play games. Express how you feel. Blocking your feelings so that you don't get hurt, is a defence mechanism that ends up doing the exact opposite. Don't be scared to get hurt, that's what love is about - taking a risk. You're gambling with your heart, hoping that you'll hit a royal flush. But the only way you'll know, is if you go all in.
At each other, with each other, about each other. Don't take life too seriously. At the end of the day, you're in this together - to create something bigger than the two of you. Whether that's a family, an empire, or a dream, chase it. Don't let it go.