12 Things Every Montrealer In Their 20's Should Be Able To Do
#12 Deal with a$$holes.
In our teens, we want to be taken seriously. In our twenties, we want to be taken care of again. Life, right? But like it or not, once you turn 20 you're expected to be a somewhat-competent adult, and below I've listed the skills that you should have (or gain) in your twenties.
1. Handle basic finances/banking
Not all of us are good with money, and that’s totally fine. But by the time you’re out of your teens you should have a savings and chequings account, a realistic budget, and the phone number of a competent accountant. Because only a fool tries to do their own taxes.
2. Sew a button
Now I may be biased because my mother taught me how to sew when I was five, but whenever I see an adult who needs someone else to sew on popped buttons I immediately wonder how they’ve made it this far in life with so few life skills. Seriously, get a sewing kit from the dollar store and google basic sewing. You’re welcome.
Photo cred - getvidzy
3. Cook a three-course meal
Okay, not everyone cooks. Fair enough. But every person should know how to prepare at least one appetizer, main course, and dessert - even if it’s just salad, pasta, and iced cream. Throw a bottle of red wine into the mix and you can now invite your grandparents over for dinner without looking like a fool.
4. Dress to impress
Every adult should be able to, at the drop of a hat, throw on a formal outfit and primp themselves into a state of attractiveness. Whether it’s for weddings, last-minute job interviews, or dinners at snazzy restaurants, you should have at least one go-to “fancy” outfit and one foolproof hair/makeup/grooming technique that you have mastered. Trust me. You don’t need it until you really need it.
5. Apologize without acting like a douche
We all fvck up. It happens. And none of us like the feeling of realizing we’ve made a mistake and having to own up to it. Just remember that apologizing IS admitting to the mistake, offering solutions to fixing it, and respecting the other person’s/people’s feelings - NOT making excuses, blaming other people, or disregarding the feelings of others. Because the only thing worse than fvcking up is being a total fartbag about it. (Yes, that’s a Hank Green reference. Go Nerdfighters!)
6. Clean an apartment
Yeah, we’re all slobs. We may try to be neat and tidy (or maybe not) but we are all still getting used to living away from home and we’re still realizing just how much housework we took for granted. Even if you don’t do it as often as you’re supposed to, you should know how to vaccuum, mop, and properly clean your bathroom and kitchen.
7. Hold your liquor
I will never judge you for being a lightweight. I will judge you, however, if you get blackout-drunk and throw up at every party you go to. Seriously, learn how much booze you can handle while still being able to function and RESPECT THAT LIMIT.
Photo cred - natgeofound
8. Do laundry
9. Host an amazing party
The secret to hosting a great party is inviting the right people, playing the right music, and offering the right food. After that, the best hosts just sit back and let the party happen, intervening only when absolutely necessary. Also, answer the door yourself and see your guests to the door when they say they’re leaving.
10. Play a musical instrument (at least a little)
It looks good on a CV, it makes you look more interesting (the weirder the instrument, the better), it’s really satisfying, and some instruments are chick-magnets, if you’re into that kind of thing. Learning how to play a few songs on the piano or guitar seems like a pointless thing to do until someone asks if you play - and then you instantly get Awesome Points.
11. Compose an at least somewhat eloquent note/letter
You’re an adult now. And part of being an adult is sending Thank You cards, condolence cards, and “Sorry I’m broke so I can’t make it to your crazy expensive destination wedding” notes. They don’t have to be Pulitzer worthy; they just have to get the point across in a smooth-ish way. But let's be real here, if you can't form a cohesive sentence, people are going to think you're stupid. Just saying.
12. Deal with a$$holes
A lot of us have trouble with this. Especially women, since we’re taught to just grin and bear it when people are being jackasses to us. I’m afraid I can’t give you much advice with this one; you just have to learn from experience when to politely deal with a$$holes, when to avoid them, and when to tell them to fvck off.