The 33 Most Difficult Things About Being Single In Montreal
No one likes to feel lonely.
Photo cred - Mike Babiarz
Facebook cover photo cred - f6abaddon
Every coin has two sides. Some people love being single. Others, not that much. Dating is more than sharing your life with someone else. It's a lifestyle.
Everybody knows life can be really tough sometimes. No wonder why it's easier when we have a loving person by our side. Love brings happiness and fulfilment.
When we're single, life is just too blue. You may enjoy your freedom but will agree with this one, eventually.
1. Empty Blankets
Winter is coming, the weather is already pretty cold outside. When we’re single, there’s no one to warm us up under the blankets and be cozy. No cuddling, no spooning. Nothing. It’s just you and the other pillow. You better go to The Bay and buy some extra ones.
2. Not Having A Love Song
Couples always have a love song. The lyrics doesn’t even matter that much. They just choose a song and that’s it. They somehow own it. When you’re single there’s no point in having a song. You can go to Le Saint Sulpice and sing a song at karaoke, but that’s it.
3. Kissing On Mount-Royal
Try going to Mount-Royal alone to see what happens. In this scenario you will see couples kissing, taking pictures and even proposing. (Who knows?) It’s a nightmare to single people. It gets a little better when you go with your friends. The thing is your friends are in a relationship, so they will bring their loved ones. The circle is endless.
4. Not Having Anyone To Go Out For Dinner
You wanna try the new Japanese restaurant in Old Montreal your boss told you about, but there’s no one to come with you. Calling and making a reservation for one person is too embarrassing. Besides, your boss told you the restaurant has a romantic atmosphere. No use in inviting your friends then.
5. Romantic Vacations
How sad is it when you hear your co-workers talking about the romantic vacations they will take with their loved ones during winter? You hear about their plans to go to Mont Tremblant, about their hot chocolates at Juliette & Chocolat, about their romantic dinners at the Old Port. This is so… heartbreaking.
6. Hot Chocolate At Lunch
There’s a Tim Horton’s close to work and your co-worker’s girlfriend always brings him some hot chocolate during lunch. You just sit there, witnessing this simple yet meaningful act of love in front of you. You ask yourself "How the hell does she do it?” The question is answered as soon as you notice she works at Tim Hortons. Lucky bastard.
7. Not Having Anyone To Share The Rent With
All your friends are moving to the Plateau and you’re still living in your studio apartment. Why? Because they are moving in with their loved ones. Therefore, the rent will be divided by two. Not by one, not like you.
8. Witnessing Other Couples’ Slow Crotch-Grinding At Sad Gigs.
You’re at a party when “Summertime Sadness” begins to play. All the couples start dancing together, in a very romantic way. You’re standing by the bar, drinking alone at this point. You look around and see other single people looking as miserable as you. That’s when you know it’s time to leave and go eat something unhealthy at Mike’s.
9. Having No One To Take Care Of Your Bad Eating Habits
You get disappointed and sad, you eat. You get anxious, you eat. You get bored, you eat even more. Of course the things you’re eating are not healthy at all. You live Downtown Montreal, close to Pizza Chez Dany. There’s no one there to tell you you should eat better. No one to care about you. (No one besides your mother — which is sad by the age of 25.) Your friends eat delicious and healthy foods because their girlfriends cook for them. But there’s no one to cook for you.
10. The Only One Single At Dinner Parties
Going to a dinner party being the only one single is the same as being an Alien at the Montreal beach. It’s too weird and people will notice. At first no one will say anything, but when the first half hour has passed they will start with the inquiry. “So you’re not dating anyone? What happened to the last guy? Are you ok?” So many questions. You wish you could disappear, but you can’t.
11. The Pity Looks
Some people will look at you as if you’re dying every time you say you’re single. Specially older people. “How can a beautiful young woman like you be single?” You don’t know the answer, do you? I guess nobody knows. The pity looks make everything even worse. If you say “It's ok, it’s no big deal!” they will tap your shoulder and feel even more compassionate.
12. Going Home Alone After A Night Out
You go out with your friends and their girlfriends and boyfriends. It’s a fun night at Cabaret Underworld and you wish it would last longer. It won't, though. Why? Because after a few hours they are all going back home together — to their own private parties. You have no other choice other than going back home — alone.
13. Watching Game Of Thrones Alone
Everybody is talking about Game of Thrones and you haven’t watched a single episode yet. People are already watching the fourth season and are saying how awesome it is. Your friends watch it with their girlfriends. You watch it with… no one. There’s no one to watch it with you. You decide to go get the first season at HMV, on Sainte Catherine street, and watch it with your cat.
14. No One To Go Watch A Movie With
There are some good movies playing on Cineplex Odeon Forum, but no one to go watch it with you. Your friends usually go with their significant others, which makes it difficult to have them coming with you. You have two options: go to the movies alone or watch it when it’s available on Apple TV. (Or Netflix.)
15. Never Being Able To Share Your Poutine
Poutine is delicious and it’s always better when shared with your loved ones. You always see your friends ordering large poutines and sharing it with their girlfriends. It looks even more tasty. But your poutine is yours and yours only. There’s no one to share it with. Suddenly you're sitting in front of your poutine, feeling lonely. You better call Chef on Call and eat it at home.
16. Romantic Comedies
Romantic comedies can be fun sometimes. It’s nice to watch it with your significant other and laugh about how our lives are like the movie. Yep, it’s awesome when you’re in a relationship. When you’re single, these movies suck. They are funny and they make you sad. Why? Because you can’t relate to it, not at all.
17. Cooking For One
Cooking is fun when there’s someone to appreciate your cooking. When you’re cooking just for yourself it becomes boring. Not because we don’t like to eat our food, but because making other people happy makes part of cooking.
18. Doing The Groceries Alone
It’s so hard to know which foods are healthy and which ones are not. If only you had a girlfriend to do the groceries with you. Every time you go to Provigo, the one close to Place-des-Arts, you end up buying Cheerios, Doritos, bread and some bananas. (To make sure you’re eating something truly healthy.)
You know there’s something wrong when you call Angela and the guy recognizes you by your voice. That’s when you know you’ve been having too many takeouts during the week. What else can you do? Going to a restaurant alone is too embarrassing and you don’t know how to cook. It’s either takeouts or eating at your friend’s place.
20. Ice Skating Alone
There are some cool activities to do during winter. One of them is ice skating in the Old Port. The fun thing about ice skating is when you do it with your significant other. It’s cute when couples are ice skating together. They help each other, they ice skate hand-in-hand, they kiss and they have fun. You watch, that’s all you can do. You can be the creepy person ice skating alone, too.
21. Eating Ice Cream Alone
Go to any ice cream store in Montreal and you will see couples eating their ice cream together. Moozoo, Mapple Delights, Ben & Jerry’s. You name it. Eating ice cream is not an option when you’re not in a relationship. Only if you’re at home, watching “Pretty Woman” in bed.
22. Parents' Inquiry
You go visit your parents in Griffintown for the holidays. How comforting is it when they start asking you about your love life in front of the rest of the family? It’s adorable, isn’t it? Your cheeks start getting flushed, they start mentioning your ex-boyfriend and asking if he’s still living in the same building. When someone else (you don’t even remember the name) answers he is dating a girl from Mile End, you know it’s time to abort mission and go back home.
23. The Only Friend Not In A Relationship
It sucks being the only one single among your friends. They start doing different kinds of things and going to different places — places and things you cannot do alone. I mean, you can but it would be too weird having a romantic dinner alone. You cannot even ride some attractions at La Ronde alone, for Christ’s Sake!
24. Having No One To Talk To
Something interested happened at work and you’re excited. You come home and… there’s no one there to listen to you. No one to call and tell your exciting news. Telling your friends would be cool, but it’s not the same. There will be no kissing and mutual excitement. It’s just too sad. You tell your cat, anyways. She understands you.
25. Having No One To Fix The Electrical Problems For Free
One of the upsides of having a boyfriend is that they can fix the electrical problems you have at your place. When you're not in a relationship, you have to pay an electrician to do the work. The sad thing is that you’re not in a relationship and had to go to Canadian Tire and buy things you don’t even remember the name.
26. Having Nothing To Add About Love And Relationships
You and your friends decided to have a girls night out at your friend's place in the Plateau. When you start drinking and talking, the main subject is relationships. They talk about love, about how annoying their boyfriends are sometimes, about how much they are in love with them, about the girls they are jealous of etc. You keep listening and not saying anything. How could you? The conversation goes on until one of your friends look at you and say, “OMG! You’re single! This must be boring, let’s change subjects!” Nice.
27. Being Depressed On Valentine’s Day
February 14th is a nightmare for you. You try not to think about it, but it seems impossible. All you can think of is that you’re not in a relationship. This is when you start asking what’s wrong with you and lying to yourself saying you want to be alone.
28. No Plus One
It’s that time of the year when everybody gets gifts and throws parties. It’s no different at work. They throw Christmas Parties and you’re always the only person who doesn’t bring a plus one. You’re always the only one. Your co-workers know it and they make fun of you every single time. You pretend not to care, obviously. You laugh with them, you make jokes about relationships with them, but deep down you’re hurt. Drinking will help the sadness go away. Drinking and going to Chez Parée later with them.
29. Having No One To Help You Buy Clothes
You’re on a budget and need to buy new clothes. Where should you begin? You go to Simons and feel completely lost. If only you had a girlfriend to help you buy clothes. It sucks not being in a relationship because you have no idea of what looks nice and what looks pathetic. Women are genius when it comes to clothing. Too bad you don’t have one by your side.
30. Having Only Beer And Pizza In The Fridge
You will end up with a collection of beer and pizza in the fridge because of your takeouts and poor groceries. At some point, that’s the only thing you will have at home. That’s when you will realize how much you miss being in a relationship with a woman who cares about you. You dress up and go to your mom’s place in Verdun to eat something healthier and hate yourself even more for being single.
At some point, your friends will pity you so much they will start arranging blind-dates for you all the time. Anyone will do. They think you should be with a girl and that's it. You lost count of how many times you went to Deville, Downtown, to meet strangers. The waiter is already your buddy and knows how hard it has been. This is sad, so sad.
32. Not Having Anyone To Give You A First Kiss On New Year’s Eve
It’s New Year’s Eve and everybody is celebrating at the Old Port. The countdown begins! 5…4…3…2…1! Happy New Year! YEEEY! You look around and there’s no one available to greet, because they are all kissing their girlfriends and boyfriends. Cool. You wait a few minutes until they stop it and then you can start greeting people. This is so annoying!
33. Having No One To Walk Hand-In-Hand With
When you go out with your friends, they are always walking hand-in-hand with their loved ones. Your hands are free, dancing in the air. You don’t even know what to do with them. When it’s winter, it’s only normal to put your hands in your pockets. But summer in Montreal can be very, very hot. What to do, then?
For more Montreal and personal insights, follow Roberta on Instagram @Robbie__Wayne