10 Things You Should Never Say To A Canadian
Tips for when you talk to someone in Canada.
Canadians are known for being overly kind. You know, we say sorry way too much and thank you way too much.
Basically, we just get made fun of for having manners. But honestly, I think that there are worse things out there. I'm pretty proud of being polite.
All that being said, there are still some things that will seriously push a Canadian's buttons. And you should know not to get in our way. We may be polite, but we're also always ready to throw down.
Here are 10 things that you should just never say to a Canadian:
Yes, okay we get it, sometimes our accents can be a little strong. But coming up to us, and shoving it our face is just plain annoying. "A-boot" is especially annoying seeing as it is so damn overused. Pretty much every TV show on the planet has made a joke about a Canadian character and whipped out the "a-boot" catchphrase. It's over. Stop it. We're not ABOUT that anymore.
2."This looks like Monopoly money"
Honestly, I think people make fun of our money so much because they're jealous. Do you know how useful it is to have money of different colors? You don't have to waste any time rifling through your money trying to find out which bill is which. Need $5? Look for blue. Need $20? Look for green. Easy peasy. Take that Americans. Have fun wasting your time looking through your wallets.
3. "Canadians are so nice!"
Okay, so I know more than my fair share of Canadian assholes. We are not all nice. No matter who we are talking about here, it is never fair to lump a whole group of people in the same box. I mean, niceness is a pretty good thing to be accused of, but it's unfair to the people that are actually nice.
4."How far away do you live from Toronto?"
Let's get one thing straight, the capital of Canada is Ottawa, not Toronto. We get that it's one of our biggest cities, and that when you say "Canada" people think Drake, and thus, Toronto. But come on! We have other cities. Our country is enormous, so asking how close we are to Toronto doesn't really make sense if the answer is 10 hours away. It's especially a touchy subject for Montreal. We're cool too.
5."Poutine is gross"
Okay well honestly, you're just dumb if you say this, and also wrong. Quebecers invented poutine and it quickly took over the entire world. There are so many variations of poutine that you probably wouldn't even be able to name them all. Cheese, fries, and gravy are a heavenly combination and Canadians will defend this classic dish until their dying breath.
6. "Do you get internet in Canada?"
Canada is NOT that far up North. We have all the technology that you do! We don't live in igloos (mostly), we drive cars, we have phones, and yes we definitely have internet! I'm not quite sure Canada has gotten such a reputation for being small-townish, but we have huge cities and as much advanced technology as the rest of the world.
We are very proud of our unofficial national sport (yeah, it's actually Lacrosse). So, hearing people diss it definitely breaks our hearts a little. Whenever there's a game on, you can be sure that Canada is watching. A lot of us can't even bear to talk about this year's Olympic losses, so really, just don't bring it up. You can dislike hockey all you want, just don't tell us about it unless you want to catch these hands.
8. "Canadian beer sucks"
Whoa, la. Have you had Canadian beer? We know how to brew. We are nice and proud of our abilities. Stop calling it "moose urine" and stop being so darn snooty. It doesn't really make sense to rag on another nation's product. Don't you like variety? Aren't we supposed to celebrate differences? I think it's very unfair to insult someone's art. Period.
9. "Do you know my cousin? They live in Canada"
Like I said before, Canada is HUGE. So, no I don't know your third cousin thrice-removed from the middle of nowhere. I'm not saying we don't want to know them. We love meeting people. But, you can't just assume that everyone in Canada somehow knows each other.
10."Canada is the 51st U.S state"
This one might surprise you, but I've personally had someone ask me what part of the United States I'm from after I expressly told them that I was Canadian. This really grinds my gears, and honestly, I don't understand how people could make that mistake seeing as Canada is bigger than the U.S! I'm not saying that all Americans suck, but Canadians really don't like being compared to their southern neighbors.