Someone asked me the other day if I'd ever be willing to date a short guy. I'm a tall girl, so for me "short" is anyone under 6'0. I apologize if I offend anyone with this blog post, don't take it personally. It's my own opinion which I'm perfectly entitled to. If you're a cute short guy, have no fear, a lot of girls are into it. Most tall girls aren't though... so your chances of dating a model are really slim. Oh, and, FYI, I have dated shorter Montreal guys in the past and they were nice and fun. However, I have encountered a bunch of inconveniences that I'd like to talk to you about. Here are ten reasons why I'll never date a short guy again. Never say never, though, right?
1. Short guys get insecure about their height
I have never met a short guy who was completely comfortable with his own height. Most are extremely self-conscious to the point of making mean comments about my height. Like this guy, for example, said I am abnormally tall because I ate products affected by nuclear radiation back in USSR. It's funny, we laughed about it. But it wouldn't be funny if I told him that he's short because he ate leprechaun food as a kid or something.
2. Short guys ask you to not wear heels
Even though I'm already tall, I still love to wear high heels. They're sexy and they make me feel confident. A few short guys have legit asked me to wear flats when I'm around them. I respect that, they're uncomfortable, it emasculates them... whatever, cool. Would I date them in the long run though? No.
3. It looks weird
A tall girl next to a short guy looks aesthetically mismatched. Like, when the two are walking together, he can't even put his arm around her shoulder. It's definitely not the worst thing that could happen to a couple, but still. No, thanks.
4. You won't feel feminine
I end up feeling like a giant next to a shorter guy. It's not flattering or pleasant. Is it all in my head? Possibly.
5. Short guys can't lift you
You definitely can't replicate that famous lift scene from Dirty Dancing with a short guy. Even sitting on a short guy's lap feels weird... it's like he should be the one sitting on your lap instead, you know?
6. Short guys tend to have the Napoleon complex
Short guys tend to act overly-aggressive or domineering in order to compensate for their height. It's actually very common for short guys to act unreasonably pushy with other men, for example, and pick fights for no reason.
7. Short guys don't look like they can protect you
It's a mental thing. As a tall girl, I don't feel protected in the company of a shorter guy. He can't be my Superman, you know what I mean?
8. Kissing standing up is weird
Making out with a shorter dude is a confusing experience. You have to bend down to reach his lips. Yeah, it's a pretty awkward feeling. You'll be secretly hoping no one can see the two of you. All of a sudden, you'll be against any kind of PDA.
9. Short guys will most probably have short kids
I can't help but think that if we end up having kids together, they might be short AF. Short offspring is not cool. They'll be like, "Thanks mom, thanks a lot!" So yeah, I'm doing it for the kids.
10. They're jealous of tall guys
My ex, who was on the shorter side, once said something like, "I'm sure you'll leave me for a tall dude." Why so insecure though? He also lost his shit on me when I spoke to a tall guy at his work. That was the only time he ever threw a fit of jealousy and it happened to be with a tall guy. Coincidence? I think not.