I love to annoy my ex boyfriends! It's the best. Especially when they finally meet someone new and I just want to have a little laugh. Like texting them something ridiculous and then screenshoting the conversation to my girlfriends. Ahhhh, it's really about the little things in life. Annoying your EX is one of the most entertaining things you could ever engage in. Try it, you will love it. The best part is when they take you seriously and give you their most genuine reaction. Let's see how you can make them lose their shit.
1. Text ridiculous things, duh!
If he posts a new photo on social media, text this: "You look like such a good fvck on your new profile picture, it's really misleading." Then you wait... He'll be like, "What do you mean?!?!" LOL
2. Place a singles ad with your ex's number on Montreal's Craigslist
Like, "Will pay good $$ to take a lady out on a dinner date. Strictly platonic. Preference will be given to girls with facial hair. Call (your ex's name) 514-999-9999" The only downfall - you won't actually get to see his reaction.
3. Sign him up on weird mailing lists
Find a weird Montreal fetish group or something and sign him up, yes. They'll receive all these promotions and event invitations. Genius.
4. Booty call him
Booty call your ex and tell him you're planning on getting drunk and crashing at his place later. He will get really excited. Then you just ignore him the rest of the night. Prepare to get bombarded with messages like, "Where are you? Are you coming? You need me to come get you?" and you're just at Schwartz's getting a smoked-meat sandwich and laughing your ass off.
5. Catfish him
Create a fake hot girl Facebook account, add a bunch of people, make it look as legit as possible. Then add your EX as a friend. Let the games begin! You already know all the things he likes, so you can actually trick him into thinking that this chick is his soul mate. Ask him out for drinks, set up a date... the world is your oyster.
6. Flirt with his relatives
Does he have cousins? Excellent. Openly flirt with his cousins on social media.
7. Contact his new fling
Message his new girl via social media, like "This might sound really weird, but I just wanted to have a serious girl to girl talk with you. Please, please, please use protection with (your ex's name)! I'm sorry for being a downer... I just wish someone warned me when I was in your shoes."
8. Call him
Call him and talk about how much you miss him. Be overly emotional and say that you really want to try and fix things. Make him actually consider meeting you up for coffee at Cafe Castel "to discuss things". End your conversation with "Just kidding!" and hang up.
9. Send him nudes
Send him the best nudes you have! Then be like, "Oops, wrong person!"
10. Maintain a relationship with his mom
His face when he comes over to his parents' house and you're there having lunch with his mom. Priceless.