As we reported earlier today, the lists of Canada's top 200 baby names for both boys and girls were released today and the results are honestly surprising. While boys' names saw a return to old classics, baby girl names continue to get funkier with spelling.
All of the names below were taken from the top names of 2018 and I, of course, do not actually think any of these names are "stupid," nor are any parents that used any of the names below. This article is simply meant to give you a chuckle and if it doesn't... then I'm sorry your parents named you Zayn.
TL;DR The year's top baby names in Canada were released today and some of them are totally hilarious... while others make you wonder if the kid is going to make it out of middle school alive.
On the boys side...
Just cause you picked the funkiest name from the One Direction boys...
Does not save you from the fact that you still named your kid after one of the One Direction boys.
Kayden, Jayden or Zayden
What is going on here!?
Why the excessive and frivolous use of the letter "y"?!
What is he going to do?
Develop telepathic powers at the age of nine and go on to found the world's only school for mutant children!?
Of all the Disney characters, this is the one you choose to name your kid after?
You mean like the hotel?
Yep, if west isn't really the direction for you, if you're truly cutting edge and different then go with Easton instead of Weston!
This is a dog's name.
Seriously. That is literally picture of my cousins dog... and his name is Maverick.
This name would also suit a cowboy, maybe?
Isn't this an island in New York that is entirely prison? Like Alcatraz but smaller?!
I feel like if you name your kid this you're essentially opening them up to people's presumption that the name has something to do with where they were conceived.... so.... ya. Choices.
This is the kind of name that just sets your kid up for a life of country music and Pabst.
Not that there's anything wrong with Pabst...
And now for the girls...
Lil, Emy, Noa
So apparently the choice with baby girl names this year was: be super unique and just... drop a letter from an already existing name.
How you going to call your daughter just Lil?
Kia, Tia, Nia
Again, what is going on here?!
Are you actually going to let your daughter go through her life being compared to a car?
I can hear the bullying now... jokes about mileage, etc.
This speaks for itself.
Ena, Aya, Eli
So... these names are just sounds. Like, you know your child will grow up and develop a fully functioning vocabulary, right?
You don't need to pick something they can pronounce from birth.
The three letter thing really had its moment in 2018...
While I'm a fan of fashion on a budget, I would be wary of associating my child with the fast-fashion brand that is constantly in the headlines.
Plus, people are really going to take advantage of this come Christmas and birthday season.
Luna, Sky, Isla
It's pretty obvious to me that Luna made it onto the list because of Chrissy Teigen's daughter.
So I don't actually think this name is stupid, more that it's funny to see it on the list after sooooo many people couldn't help but name their kid after a celeb child. She is crazy cute, though.
But celestial and geographic names seem to be a larger trend, too.
Next we're going to see girls named Volcano and Sea. Soil. Cloud. Why stop at Isla when you can go all out and name your daughter Archipelago?
And I'm sure there are already kids with the name Ocean living in Portland somewhere.