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adam susser

[VIDEO] Teaching People In Toronto How To Speak "Quebec French"

While here in Montreal, we sometimes like to argue about which language to order pasta in at the restaurant, the fact that we can even understand French most of us take for granted, and ultimately should makes us really proud.

Cross the border into Ontario, it's a complete different story, where français to a Torontonian might as well be Swahili.

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8 Ways To Party Better In Montreal By A Drunk Comedian

People almost never come to me for advice. But that doesn’t stop me from giving it. I am a gentleman, and that’s why I decided to create a gentleman’s guide to partying more efficiently and successfully here on our mountainous, frozen island.

Put the stripper pole away and get in touch with your body’s inner flow. For these are the skills you’ll need to work on if you want to be more successful the next time you’re sipping your favourite 8.1% 40oz in your neighbourhood park.

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Watch Montrealers Try New York Bagels

Remember when I went to New York City, fed their people our bagels and told them to put Montreal Steak Spice on it? Remember? Well, if you don’t, here, watch this.

When I was in NYC I decided to kill two American eagle-birds with one Canadian stone and bring back NYC bagels so that I could make a video with Montrealers eating them. Clever, eh? Well, I think so.

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Yarn Bombing Explodes All Over Montreal

If you’ve been seeing inanimate objects covered in yarn all our city, it’s not the egg-nog messing with your peepers, it’s the truth! Hippies and tree-huggers have been “yarn bombing” their way across our city, hoping to brighten Montrealer’s days and encourage the creation of new friendships. I got to the bottom of these explosions and attempted a little yarn related friendship making of my own.

How Not To Do An Interview With A Pop Star

Jaden Chase is dropping a new music video this weekend. Adam Susser, being a purveyor of all that's cool among 18 year olds, knows this and jumped at the chance to interview his favourite barely of age pop star.

Montrealers List Their Top 10 Places To Speak French In Montreal

I constantly feel sorry for the writers at MTLBlog. When they're not stealing photos or working for free, they're busy coming up with inane and repetitive lists. So I decided to help my team out and make some of my own lists they can use, free of charge. I asked people on the street for help. They tried their best, but generally speaking, people are stupid. MTLBlog writers, they are not.

[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_jstrUGhi4[/embed]

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This Is Serious, Montreal Introduces Its All-New Plans To Make Winter Easier For You

Even on the best of days, winter sends me into a panicky hissy fit. The snow petrifies me, the cold hurts my thoughts, and my Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) leaves me crying in the bathroom on my lunch-breaks.

Anyways, I’m seriously considering cancelling my prescriptions of Celexa, Paxil, Sarafem, Pexuva, Adapin, Laxpro, and even Pristiq(!), now that Mayor Coderre is releasing a list of initiatives aimed at softening Mother Nature’s wintery, cold grip on our fair city. That’s right, I’m actually going to try and get through winter this year on only Zelepar, Parmate, and Marplan. Wish me luck!

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This Is Serious, Montrealer's React To The SAQ's Extremely Bold New Plans For 2015

Winter is at our doorstep.

Unlike summer, where we drink to forget, in winter we drink because we’re sad. Thank goodness for the SAQ! In addition to adding home delivery as a new service, our favourite government institution is unveiling a brand marketing campaign at curbing our province’s collective sadness.

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This Is Serious, Montreal Finally Releases Its List To Combat Poop Smell In The City

#ShitStormMontreal.

Probably the most important hashtag you will see in 2014. It was impossible to step outside in Montreal last week without smelling poo. Believe me, I tried. Eager to not have the situation turn into an “epoodemic” (get it? poo), this morning, Montreal City Hall released a list of precautions Montrealers are advised to take until the source of this problem is discovered and eradicated.

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This Is Serious, Montrealers React To The City's Bizarre Plans For Its 375th Anniversary In 2017

Forget renaming the Champlain Bridge after Rocket Richard. Let the thought of adding an M and an L to both sides of the Mont Royal cross slip from your mind. To celebrate Montreal’s 375th anniversary in 2017, our city’s government decided to take the high road and go nuts. Someone’s playing to win and his name rhymes with Flenis O’Hare. If you were expecting to wake up to a nice quiet morning in front of your computer screen to porridge eating and Fresca drinking, think again, muchacho.

I’m talking about beaver play dates, government-subsidized poutines, and so much Celine Dion that you’re gonna wish you were never born here. Just kidding. That would never happen.

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This Is Serious, Montrealer Raises Money For Cats With Irritable Bowel Syndrome

On Wednesday October 29th 2014, our nation celebrated one of our oldest and most beloved holidays: National Cat Day. As a tribute to our fuzzy national treasures, I devoted my day to raising money for cats who suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome (excessive poo). If you’re a human reading this, who at one point or another has suffered from IBS, then you know that diarrhea is no laughing matter.

Now imagine yourself a helpless cat. Instead of having hands to wipe your butt, you have paws. Good luck wiping your butt with paws!  Not happening. So that’s why, on Wednesday, I tried to make it so that cats don’t need to dream about growing humans hands to wipe their butts (or have alternate dreams where their paws magically possess that ability) and sought to stop the problem at the source. On one of our nation’s greatest holidays, I tried to do something useful and eradicate Feline IBS for good. What were you doing that day? This Is Serious.

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This Is Serious, Montreal's Ladybug Infestation Terrorizes The City

Last week, as unsuspecting Montrealers revelled in the humid, Indian Summer by licking ice cream off the sidewalks and playing with their Slip ‘N Slides, hordes of rabie-laced ladybugs terrorized sick people and the elderly. To combat The Horde (as I like to call them), this week, the City of Montreal released a Public Safety Advisory with steps able-bodied people can take to protect themselves. Thank God.

Although these public safety measures come as a sign of relief, I have noticed that the ladybug attacks from last week, decreased substantially this week. (So far this week I have not seen a single ladybug in my apartment, and last week I saw 3! That’s a 300% decrease in ladybug attacks on my end).

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