A Viral TikTok Video Ranks Montreal Icicles By Deadliness & Damn... We Live In A Deathtrap

Winters in Montreal have their good and their bad parts, and Maryze's recent viral TikTok video exposes the oh-so-dangerous parts of the season.

The Montreal-based musician posted to her 18.7K followers on TikTok and her 5K followers on Instagram how she rates the icicles around the city by the most obvious way to rank them: their deadliness.

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Starting off with one placed directly above the doorway of an apartment, she rates it 8/10. She then moves onto what she calls "double trouble," two rows of icicles along the side of a building. Describing them as "double ze icicles, double ze pain," she rates them 9/10. Pretty deadly.

Now, don't think that all icicles in Montreal are scary — She finds very small icicles that are, "no problem, don't worry." Only a 3/10. Phew. Then a couple of small ones that may seem harmless, but if they were to fall on you, you'd become a "porcupicicle."

But then... she shows off what can only be described as the Holy Grail of icicles, which she very appropriately responds to with, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME? This could kill your whole family," giving the very appropriate rating of 20/10.

When asked why she made the video, the singer told MTL Blog, "I grew up in Vancouver and had never seen anything like Montréal winters before. "

"The icicles were shocking to me so I decided to make a compilation without thinking it would really go anywhere!"

As for what she loves and hates about Montreal winter, she said, "My least favourite part of winter here is navigating around all the ice and snow, but my favourite thing is having the time to focus on writing and recording music in the hibernation months."