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The Montreal Alouettes Are Introducing A $90 Mega-Poutine Served In A Football Helmet

And it weighs 1.2 entire kilogram. For real.

Staff Writer
Alouette Poutine promotional poster. Right: Montreal Alouettes helmet on a field.

Alouette Poutine promotional poster. Right: Montreal Alouettes helmet on a field.

How much poutine is too much? The answer depends on who you ask. For most, a regular-sized poutine from La Banquise is more than enough and even perfect for some leftovers the next day. Rare are the ones who ever felt the need to measure this amount in kilograms — until today.

The Montreal Alouettes have raised this critical question by introducing a special poutine, available at their home game on Thursday, August 4. The monstrous meal consists of "four poutines in one" and weighs a whopping 1.2 kg — oh yeah, and it comes in a football helmet, which you get to keep.

The Alouettes recently released a new helmet design, which the new helmet-bowls match. This could very well be a factor in the invention of this behemoth of a meal.

The team is also very clear that the only way to get your hands on these wearable souvenirs is to buy — and then presumably finish — 1.2 kilograms of house-made poutine.

1.2 kilograms, to be precise, of a unique combination of ingredients. Topping your standard potato fries and cheese curds are pulled pork, fried onions, and, according to the product launch details, "caramel popcorn." We can only hope that, as depicted in the accompanying photos, the popcorn is served separately.

But at this point, it wouldn’t be the most surprising thing about this exorbitant entrée.

The $90 price tag has already made people on Twitter uneasy. Sports food is expensive, we know this, but four twenties and ten whole dollars? It’s a little much.

But again, it’s hard to find an Alouettes helmet anywhere else — and Twitter users quickly picked up on this too.

If you’re a true fan and you love the new helmet design, maybe this is the opportunity you’ve been waiting for.

And if you pay with a $100 bill, you can use that leftover tenner to buy yourself some well-earned Tums.

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