A Montrealer Buried A Big Dildo In The Sidewalk In Front Of His Store To Spite The City

Sidewalk construction work made things hard for a Saint-Henri business owner, so he took matters into his own hands. In the January 30 episode of the podcast Money Buys Happiness, Vintage Frames CEO Corey Shapiro recounted how a battle with the city over a sidewalk tree led him to bury a dildo in front of his store in a firm gesture of his disapproval of the planting location.

"I came into work to find the city, digging up a large plot of cement in front of my store," Shapiro told MTL Blog. Workers, he said, were preparing to plant a tree that would block the view of his costly, meticulous storefront design on rue Notre-Dame.

Things escalated after some back and forth. "I politely explained to [the city workers] that if they were going to put fresh cement in front of my store, I was going to dip my balls into it." Shapiro documented that exchange in a September Instagram post.

Luckily for his scrotum and generations of passersby to come, the heavens intervened before that threat could materialize. That same day, Shapiro found a dildo of generous proportions in front of his store, ostensibly a demonstration of support by fans.

"The intention I think was to put it in the cement. We aren't animals, we only thought it would be right to give the dildo a proper burial in front of the store."

A subsequent Instagram video captures the burial ceremony, complete with mourners, flowers and a eulogy by rapper Bun B of the group UGK.

Shapiro says the phallus remains in that plot of dirt to this day, a buried treasure for an unlucky (or lucky, depending on their sexual proclivities) future excavator.

"Dildo will always be with us, buried in front of our store, with a special place in our hearts. Life was hard for dildo."