Summer is the season when Montreal comes alive.
After a brutally long winter spent shuffling along in the Underground City and trekking through downtown snowdrifts bundled up like Canadian babushkas, the sun finally comes back, and we all flock outside.
Restaurant terraces sprout out of the sidewalks and tumble into the streets. Roads are closed to drivers so that pedestrians can wander through dozens of free festivals, concerts, and art installations. And influencers and tourists alike flock to the same ten or so overhyped locations.
Let's be fair: places get overhyped for a reason. None of the locations I'm about to list off are bad. They're picturesque, fun, and a great surface-level representation of the city for newcomers.
But if you've been in Montreal for longer than a week, you're likely to try to avoid them in favour of the many other great destinations the city has to offer.
With that out of the way, here's where you're not going to catch me in Montreal this summer.
Plage de l'Horloge
The Hype: It's a gorgeous spot to play beach volleyball or get a tan right under the historic clock tower. There are clear views of the Old Port and the boats going by on the Saint-Lawrence River. And the travel distance from the closest metro stop is unmatched.
Why It's A No For Me: You can't swim there. And I don't mean the water's choppy or the river has sharp stones – I mean the sand is fenced off from the major waterway in front of it.
Mind you, the water is rightfully off-limits. But as someone who loves to swim, having the water so tantalizingly close but still out of reach does put a damper on the experience.
Where I'm Going Instead: Here in Quebec, we're utterly spoiled when it comes to freshwater beaches, and Montreal is no exception. In my opinion, the best options for on-Island beach days are both in the West Island.
If I'm driving, I'd prefer Plage de Cap-Saint-Jacques in Pierrefonds. And if public transit is everybody's only option, then I prefer Beaconsfield Beach.
The Grande Bibliothèque
The Hype: This truly is an excellent library – maybe the best in the entire province. This five-story, seven-level marvel of modern architecture offers every library service imaginable, a gorgeous outdoor garden, and a basement cafe.
It's also the flagship location of the Bibliothèque et Archives nationales du Québec (BAnQ), and is connected to a province-wide network of libraries.
Why It's A No For Me: Like some other modern buildings, the upper levels of the Grande Bibliothèque are mezzanines around a shared open-concept stairwell, with low walls made of glass and floor-to-ceiling glass elevators.
This building choice allows for a delightful amount of natural light. But it's a literal nightmare if you have a fear of heights.
I once walked upstairs from the third floor and was shaking by the time I reached the fourth floor. I couldn't even hold on to the railing because it's attached to a waist-high glass barrier that keeps you from four stories of empty space.
You're probably braver than I am about these things. But I literally can't even.
Where I'm Going Instead: Another architectural marvel (sans the vertigo) I'd recommend is the BAnQ's location in the Old Port: the Archives nationales à Montréal.
And when it comes to a bookish day of work or study, the Westmount Library will always be my favourite.
The building itself is gorgeous. It has multiple floors of comfy seats, and it's sandwiched between the stunning Westmount Conservatory and Greenhouses and the beautifully-designed Westmount Park.
Schwartz's Deli
The Hype: This deli is a Montreal institution. It's one of the oldest delis in the city and remains one of the best spots to get the kind of smoked meat sandwich that Montreal is known for.
Newcomers in the city should absolutely grab a bite from Schwartz's upon arrival.
Why It's A No For Me: I'm not a newcomer, so I'd rather not hazard a long line to get a sandwich. I also generally don't want to eat lunch surrounded by tourists in my own neighbourhood.
Where I'm Going Instead: No question, I'm going to Snowdon Deli. Another Montreal institution off the tourist radar, it's been the deli of choice in my family for four generations and counting.
This is also where I'd take a friend who had never had Ashkenazi Jewish cuisine before and wanted to give it a try. I recommend their smoked meat sandwich (served with mustard and a pickle on the side, naturally), their matzo ball soup, and their gefilte fish.
LaRonde
The Hype: It's a Six Flags amusement park 15 minutes from the downtown core with an annual fireworks competition that lasts all summer – what's not to love?
Why It's A No For Me: The prices, that's what's not to love. And like most amusement parks, the lines are long and it can take a while to get from one end of the park to the other, so it can be hard to feel like you got your money's worth.
Plus, all of the concrete turns the place into a seat sink with very little shade in the summer. So every time I've been in hot weather, at least one person in my friend group has gotten heatstroke.
Where I'm Going Instead: Maybe it's my water sign astrology showing, but I always have a way better time at Super Aqua Club in Pointe-Calumet than LaRonde.
The water park is half an hour from Montreal, has more rides and attractions than LaRonde with shorter wait times, and is more affordable.
Also, I don't know who decided to put a lakeside bar in the middle of a waterpark, but I want to give them a high-five. Those spicy margaritas are delicious.
Hiking up Mount Royal
The Hype: It's a semi-demanding hike in a beautiful park. Your reward at the end is a stunning view of downtown from the top of the city. It's definitely worth doing at least once.
Why It's A No For Me: At this time of year, the trail is full of influencers on a quest to get "that" shot of themselves with the downtown skyline behind them.
I respect the hustle. But for a local looking to just enjoy the scenery, it's better to wait until autumn. (Besides, Mount Royal is at its most picturesque once the leaves change their colours anyway.)
Where I'm Going Instead: While I'm happy to wait a few weeks to go up the mountain, for anyone with climbing or canyon experience, I'd recommend checking out the Saint-Léonard Cave this summer.
People are always surprised to hear that there are caverns under Montreal, let alone that you can explore them. Spéléo Québec even offers some training courses in the Saint-Léonard Cave!
And if I'm in the mood to gaze over the top of the city, I'll be doing so from a rooftop resto – most likely Terrasse Sur L'Auberge or Terrasse Nelligan in the Old Port.
The Wheel
The Hype: La Grande Roue de Montréal, also called The Wheel, is a 60-meter-tall Ferris wheel and an iconic landmark in Montreal's Old Port.
It's open every day of the year (apart from during exceptionally dangerous weather) and presents a 360℃ view of the entire Island. On a clear day, you can see up to 28 kilometres of landscape.
And I've been told the view at night is spectacular.
Why It's A No For Me: Having ridden the Niagara SkyWheel before, which is only slightly smaller than The Wheel, I can confidently say that being suspended nineteen stories in the air in a glass box is not my idea of a good time.
But if that image isn't quite thrilling enough for you, The Wheel even has a "VIP Gondola" with a glass floor and leather seats. Some couples will reserve it for a night ride and look out at the city lights together. It's incredibly romantic.
Where I'm Going Instead: When I want breathtaking views above and beyond the city, I go to Saint Joseph's Oratory. As well as being an active church and an iconic marvel of Montreal architecture, the Concourse towards the top of the Oratory is a staggering 80 meters above street level.
Even if you're not Catholic, seeing the sun set over the Laurentians mountains all the way from downtown Montreal can definitely feel like a religious experience.
The Ring
The Hype: To be honest, I don't really know. It's… a ring? Floating perilously above a pedestrian route in front of Place Ville Marie? Framing an already-good view?
It's an architectural feat, sure, and it does attract tourists as intended… but why a ring? What does it have to do with Montreal? Seriously.
Why It's A No For Me: I've seen it, I've walked under it on my way elsewhere, and I've struggled to take a decent picture of it. I've moaned with friends about how many of our tax dollars went into building it.
I feel about The Ring the way Chicagoans feel about The Bean. I lowkey love The Bean, and would love to see it if I ever visit Chicago, but locals understandably don't get why tourists are so into it.
Where I'm Going Instead: Literally anywhere else.
The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Narcity Media.
