Editor's Choice: We Had No Clue This Nondescript Home In Downtown Montreal Is Actually An Elaborate Palace
The DeniersÂ
If you're a COVID-19 denier, you probably downplay the threat of the coronavirus and refuse to follow public health guidelines.
We suggest something like this reptilian monster from Saving Grace Tattoo in Notre-Dame-de-Grâce, since you might also believe our public health officials worship the reptilian elite.
The Harmers
If you identify as a COVID-19 harmer, you might try to weaponize COVID-19 and put others in harm's way, likely through unsanitary measures like coughing or sneezing on them.
If you're a harmer, get something like this skeleton casually holding coffee from Imago Tattoo Studio in the Plateau, since the threat of death doesn't scare you.
The Rebels
If you're a rebel, you're probably not following Quebec's COVID-19 rules. You might've even received a few $1,500 fines for breaking curfew. If you are following the rules, you're yearning for the day you can do something rebellious again.
Get inked with something like this cup of Lean from Thermal Ink Tattoo in the Plateau to solidify your commitment to partying.
The Invincibles
Invincibles are those friends you have who continue to rent Airbnbs in Saint-Sauveur despite calls from public health officials heavily discouraging interregional travel.
If you think you're an Invincible, go ahead and get tattooed with something like this little Pierrot from Flaming Tattoo Club in Mercier-Hochelaga-Maisonneuve since you've likely been calling our elected officials "clowns" all day and night.
The Blamers
Blamers transfer blame for their fears about the coronavirus to others, projecting pandemic issues onto health care workers and certain racial groups.
Blamers should get a tattoo like an angry lemon from Coop Crève-Cœur in the Gay Village, a testament to their perpetually sour disposition.
The Spreaders
Spreaders just want things to go back to normal and believe in COVID-19 "herd immunity." (Super) spreaders make up those in your life who see as many people as possible despite lockdown.
Spreaders should get this tattoo by Frédérique Poulin-Thomas from Repère aux Loups in the Plateau — we think it's fairly self-explanatory.
The Realists
Realists recognize the effects and risks of COVID-19 and the reality of the pandemic, adjusting their behaviour appropriately. Basically your average Joe.
If you like classic tattoo themes, as realists would, you should book a floral arrangement from Sarah Laub at Adrenaline in the downtown core of Montreal.
The Exploiters
Exploiters are a minor group of people who exploit the pandemic for power or inhumanity.
We suggest a bloody and rotting tooth like this one from Nicolas Durand at Semelius Tattoo in Mile-End.
The Worriers
If you're a worrier, you're constantly consuming COVID-19 news and need to know the latest updates so you can share them with your friends.
Worriers should get something like this cute ouija planchette by Carolanne at Black Rose Tattoo in the Plateau — it may be able to give you an indication as to when the pandemic will be over.
The ContemplatorsÂ
Contemplators are thriving in our era of self-isolation, having just been given a prime excuse to stay indoors while contemplating their lives and the state of the world.
Contemplators should get tatted with something like this Bojack Horseman number from Flaming Tattoo Club in Mercier-Hochelaga-Maisonneuve since they may feel Bojack's existential plight all too well.
The Hoarders
If you jetted to Costco at the start of the pandemic to clear out every toilet paper roll in stock to keep your anxiety at bay, this one's for you.
Consider this grapefruit by Mathieu at MTL Tattoo in the Plateau to remind yourself of how much extra "emergency" grocery ended up rotting in your fridge.
The Supporters
If you're a supporter, you've probably clapped for a frontline health worker or made a "ça va bien aller" rainbow for your window at the start of the pandemic.
You should get inked with something like this little pug by Clément Sicot from Desolé Maman Studio in Mile-End since it will bring smiles to those who see it — just as you aim to do.
The Innovators
Innovators are entrepreneurs and hard workers who have put their skills to use by creating new systems, masks, vaccines and hospital equipment in record time during the pandemic.
If you're a creative innovator, you should get something like this lovely little sun piece from Chloe Luna Solis at Coop Crève-Cœur in the Village to represent your efforts to help Quebecers see brighter days post-COVID-19.
The Altruists
Altruists have been supporting the elderly in CHSLDs, as well as doing what they can to support the homeless and those in need throughout the pandemic. If this is you, we salute you!
Altruists should get this emotional support ghost duo from Violette Violence at Les Chochottes in Mercier-Hochelaga-Maisonneuve to represent all the good work they've done to provide support during the pandemic.
The Veterans
The veteran crew is made up of those of us who are old enough to remember H1N1, the OG SARS outbreak and the Ebola virus disease, and consider COVID-19 just another opportunity to avoid people altogether.
Veterans can get dainty script from Atelier Olibrius in Rosemont-La Petite-Patrie since they've likely gone through a self-love journey and enjoyed their alone time during the pandemic.
The Warriors
Warriors have been indispensable to the general public throughout the year-long pandemic and make up our frontline health care workers, doctors, nurses and essential workers.
Big ups to all the warriors! You should get something like this mythological Libra warrior from Melle Alyx at Meme Pas Mal MTL in the Plateau as your post-pandemic piece — a testament to how hard you worked despite the uncertainty caused by COVID-19.
